Favorite

My 4th birthday has just gone by, and I was with my parents, grandmother and older sister, who celebrated her birthday a month before mine. My grandma, who was the mother of my father, asked my parents to bring us to a store because she said that will buy a doll as a present for my sister. I was hoping that she would buy me, too. I was very excited to enter into the department store. I looked around and I saw wonderful toys that were being sold. My heart leapt with awe. My grandma was holding my older sister, who is her first grandchild. She was asking my sister what she wanted.

After 30minutes of looking around, my sister arrived, holding a big bag and I knew that inside it was a doll. I was silent, but I was hoping that my grandma would give me something. I was waiting, but she didn’t give me any, not even a small toy.

I was so hurt. I cried but I did not want any of them know what I was feeling that time. I was just silent. I was asking myself why my grandma didn’t give me a gift even though my birthday was just 3 days ago. And she gave my sister a doll and her birthday was already a month ago!

I knew then that maybe my grandma didn’t like me. When we went inside the car, my sister sat in front with her, while I sat at the backseat.

There was also this once instance when I was in our hardware store in Binondo. My grandma handed a check to my mother. It was for my sister. I went inside the storage room and I silently cried. My mom was looking for me and she found me with my eyes red. She asked me why I was crying. I pointed to her the check she was holding. When my grandma learned that I was crying, she immediately got her checkbook and wrote something on the paper. She told me that I have a check also. I looked at the paper which she was handing to me. It looked different from the one she gave for my sister. I knew inside of me that it was just a worthless paper. But I stopped crying so that my mom would worry no more.

These things happened when I was only about 4 or 5 years old. Imagine, at that age, I know already what a bank check looks like!

I have forgotten all about these incidents but I remembered it when I had my psychotherapy.

I am not angry at my grandma. She is now in California. It is okay for me if she does not like me. I still respect her because she is the mother of my father. And that is just it.

When I get hurt or if I have some things inside my head, I just kept it to myself and not wanting others to know what my true feelings were. But, all these changed because of Dr. Abas. I learned that keeping things inside is not very healthy.

Okay, I admit it. Sometimes, I still do keep my feelings inside up to now… Good thing there is blogging, where I could pour out all of myself…

 

 

Podiocast by Odiogo.com

As you can see here in my blog, i added a widget which is a Listen Now Button. It is from odiogo.com. The service is free, so you might also want to add it on your blog. It is really cool hearing what you wrote in your site.

Some of your readers may like your blog, but they do not have time to read your articles, and so, Odiogo is a time saver. They could listen to your writings through their iPod, mobile phones, or MP3 players.

We all know that podcast is very expensive. You have to hire a person who have a good voice just to record what you have written in your site. But Odiogo is different.

The voice you hear on podiocast is computer generated.

To listen to your podiocast, I guess you have to wait like 30minutes after posting your fresh content on your site, before it would become available to listen to.

And did I tell you that this service is free?

 

 

I'll Say Goodbye For The Two Of Us

 

 

Woman Auctions Her Virginity

The New York Post has reported that a woman is auctioning her virginity to pay for her Master's degree education in Family and Marriage.

Nathalie Dylan, the student from San Diego, California, who is willing to give her virginity to the right person for the right price, has received numerous offers from 10,000 men. The highest bid so far is £2.5million. There is even a zookeeper who promised her that he will give her a live tiger if she chose him.

She got the idea of offering herself to men, from her sister, Avia, 23years old, who successfully raised her money and finished her degree, by working as an escort for 3weeks.

Dylan said that she will not actually choose the highest bidder, who wants to have sex with her provided that it will be recorded on video. Currently, She is still getting offers from rich businessmen and weirdos.

Photo from telegraph.co.uk

 

 

I am Cool

I saw that I have lots of Entrecard credits on my EC account. I decided to randomly (I really do not want to use this word since I noticed that it is one of the most used words in the world of blogging together with rave, rants, ramblings and all adjectives that start with the letter R. Is it a coincidence that they all start with the letter R?) purchased ads on different famous blogs.

Some of the ads I purchased was accepted but some were turned down. It was okay for me if they rejected the ads I purchased.I have been turned down a lot of times but there is this one instance when the owner of the blog sent me a message telling me that she feels terrible for not accepting my blog because she is not comfortable for my blog to be featured in her site. She is very apologetic since she only turned down a small number of bloggers before. And now, I belong to those small crowd.

My first reaction to it was, "What?". It is completely all right for me to be rejected but it made me ponder on what was wrong with my blogsite.
1. Was it my header photo? Actually, Inside those twins there are my brains. I cannot place my face on my blog because I write sensitive issues at times and I want to protect the people I love. And besides, I like my header. It is unique.
2. Oh, yeah! Maybe the sensitive issues I wrote? The sex stories? I stopped writing this type of stories since it needs lots of imagination.
3. Maybe due to the fact that my blog category is different from hers? Honestly, I do not know what my blog category is. I just write whatever I want to share.

Whatever my blog is, this is me. Like everyone else. We are what our blog is. She is not comfortable with my blog? That means she is not comfortable with me. I pour my heart and soul into my site. This is me. This is the true me. You may accept me or not, but this is the real me. It is hard to please people and it is good I stopped pleasing them, for if I still do, I would be heartbroken.

It is okay to be rejected. I am cool.

 

 

Happy New Year! (I Survived 2008)

2008 was a wonderful year. Many events happened in the 365 days of 2008. I must admit I did things that I was not proud of, but the good thing is I learned from it. Debbie said that "the past is just the past and that is it".

I was very emotional when the clock pointed their hands exactly at 12. It is a mixed emotion for the incoming year. I could very well say that I have matured a lot. It is only when I turned 35 in 2008 which I realized that I have matured. Yes, I am now a different person.

I would like to thank the following people who gave me hope. I know that I sounded like I have just received an award, but it is more than just an award. These are the people who inspired me to strive hard in life. I am really blessed by God for these people whom I met only thru online but are very concerned of me.

Debbie of Wisdom Hypnosis
Maddy of Great Registry
Gem the Lady Programmer
Is of My Online Biz

Confession of a Fitness Diva and Wilson frequently comment on my articles, and I am very thankful to them also.

For those people who commented but I have not mentioned, thank you for the encouragement and comforting words.

I pray to God to continuously bless these people for being so willing and caring to help others.